3.25.17 cancun 4^th  day

Took a ferry and met my future wife on it. SUPPPPPERRRR sexy. Sexy face, sexy body. Big boobs. She was excited to hear all of my stupid stories. She’s super smart. She points out inconsistencies in my stories. I’m marrying this girl and having 18 kids with her. But the texts are cold and sparse. I invite her to Palazzo tonight. She “can’t make any promises”

Went to palazzo. Event day again. Holy fuck. Again the guy to girl ratio will be 3:1. Have to start early or else everything will be lost. Instead I started watching girls dance on a dance pole and lost momentum. 30 minutes later, the 3:1 ratio was established and the chances were astronomically reduced. I realized that and I told John that we’ll both do 5 approaches each then go on the sidewalk. I did my 5 approaches. COmpletele failure. John did 3. 

Then I saw the red hair girl with big boobs. All by herself. She must have just got in so the 3:1 ratio didn’t start yet. I approached her, lifted her off the stairs and put her down. Tiny little thing. Red hair but no blue eyes. Can’t be picky. I started running game while running my hands on her body. Didn’t like her hair pulled. She didn’t drink at all that night. I tried pulling twice on the sidewalk. Tried pulling home. She said she’s on her period. I should have ended right there. Instead I kept going. She met up with her friend and another guy, I pulled them all to another club, made out with her more, sucked on her boobs then they all left. Went home alone on the bus, depressed and angry. Texted my LA therapist to tell her how lonely I feel.

My future wife texts me “I saw you with that girl last night.” I respond “I was just trying to make you jelous. Did it work.” She just laughs. I apologize. The marriage is off. I feel more lonely than ever.

3.26.17 cancun 5^th day

Bought some bullshit $80 ticket to some gayass show. John gets screened at the door and  can’t get in because of his Viagra pill. He goes home at 11:30 pm. Weak sauce. I go in there. It’s meant for a 150 person theater but they packed 600 people. I was by the exit staring in. The show was garbage. Just music videos on a screen and I left in 15 minutes. I pay to get in another club. Holy moly. The girl to guy ratio is 1:1. I’m fucking tonight FOR SURE. I start drinking again OPEN BAR again. I meet my Mateo friend at his usual table. I tell him that I’ll try to bring some girls to his table. I start dancing with a Latina girl with ZERO English. But love is a universal language so it doesn’t bother me. I stop dancing because I’m afraid she’s a puta. I don’t want to pay for sex. I go around, dance a little more with other girls. I keep getting rejected. No one wants to fuck tonight. 

I go to Senor Frogs. I see this tall SEXYYYY girl. But she says something in code “these are my brothers.” Translation – if you want to fuck me, you have to get them girls too. Ah shit. Hard as hell. I don’t care about that code. I start dancing with her, feel her up. Place is closing. I try to pull but her stupid brothers are there. They go to another bar, I can’t get in. I’m left on the sidewalk. I get robbed by 2 prostitutes right there on the sidewalk. I can’t get home. Cabbie says “don’t worry” and takes me to an ATM. He robs me too by overcharging me. I go home sad as fuck. I angrily tell john my story.

I get robbed again at the airport. “Where’s your visa” wtf is that. I came here to party not some gayass visa stay. “You have to check in with immigration” where we pay $35 to finally get out of the damn country.